Widow Grass Paintings

It has been 10 days since my man left.  I started really missing him on day 4.  That is not good.  There are still 2 more days until his return. And I have felt the rawness of it for 6 days now. I am sobered to think the loneliness I feel is just a fraction of the loss a widow would feel. Or a divorced person.  Or someone still in a relationship, who has lost their hope in love.  They say, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder”. It is true but I would add, “Absence grows old”.  People marvel at how STRONG I am.  I marvel at the strength that God grants.
Darron did not choose to be gone this long.  He is diligent about planning his schedule long in advance.  Breaking up the times to short stints.  But Indonesia is not a country respectful of long range planners.  Nor is the school.  Darron really desired to be at Aubrey’s 8th grade graduation, which was announced 2 months ago…..long after Darron’s planning session.  So he had to do some mighty fine juggling to make it so that he could be home in time for that event.  I respect Darron’s desires to be here for some of the children’s school highlights.  I respect him for working so hard to try and not let too many of these long hauls creep into our calendar year.

My last snapshot of Darron as he took off with Bob.

Tonight I pull out my paint brush.  Nothing eases the hollowness of Darron being gone for long stretches of time….but forcing myself to do something creative helps pass the time.  It also pleases me.  And so the widow grass paints.  I have a habit of painting when Darron is gone.  Always have.  The Philippines it was trees.  Cuba it was flower pots, or was it picket fences?  This time it has been scripture verses, a measuring place, and a sweet love saying. 



When I count my blessings….I count you twice.


You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength…..teach them diligently to your children…..write them on the doorposts of your house.


We leave for America in just over 2 weeks.  We will be together for a solid 7 weeks.  I’ll put my paint brush down and drink in time with the one I love.  We both keep talking about our time that we will have together alone at a bed and breakfast (Whitestone Inn,  Tennessee), that provides 4 free nights a year to missionaries.  It is worth it to wait quietly and expectantly.  In the meantime, I’ll keep on painting and praying.  The jungle grass is swaying in the hot wind.